I'm back. Again. And guess what? I've moved, again. Life has been so crazy in the last year sometimes I feel like I'm just along for the ride, holding onto a run-away trainwreck for dear life.
In late March I realized I needed a change. Living alone in a rural area of Illinois was taking a toll on me, physically and emotionally. My friends were in Chicago and Michigan, my family in Evanston and my partner at the time in New Orleans. I thought I should "stick it out" and stay in Putnam, but after losing almost 35lbs I realized how unhappy I was.
So I moved. And started over again. That's one of the joys of being 23 -the only baggage I have is my student loans and mini-menagerie of animals. No mortgage, no kids, just aging dogs and a vague sense of what I wanted.
I'm getting there, finally. I just moved to a studio in Edgewater and am working two part time jobs. I'm trying to figure out how to organize my stash, sewing machine and spinning wheel into my "craft nook", already have my bookshelves in place and have found the closest (and truly amazing) place to find craft beer. I'm also a 20 minute walk away from Hopleaf, one of the most amazing beer bars I've ever seen and am fully enjoying eating and drinking my way through the North Side of Chicago.
My time in the country was certainly not ill spent. It gave me a lot of time to analyze what I want, to come to terms with my goals, feelings and outlook on life. It strengthened some relationships and illuminated the need to move on from others.
The biggest struggle I have faced since graduating in 2009 is how to synthesize all the aspects of my personality. I knit. I brew beer. I love living simply but I also love shoes. I am a feminist who likes gentlemently men and romance. I am a feminist who takes very little crap from people. I love dogs more than I like most people, but love dressing up and going to social functions. Like most people, I am full of contradictions. Trying to figure out who I am is an exciting and terrifying journey, but I am very glad to be able to do so in Chicago, surrounded by amazing friends and opportunities. And also really good yarn stores and bars.